A family is at the dinner table. The son asks the father: “Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?”
The father, surprised, answers. “Well, son, a woman goes through three phases. In her 20s, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round, and firm. In her 30s and 40s, they are like pears, still nice, but hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions.” “Onions?” the son asks. “Yes. You see them and they make you cry.”
This infuriated his wife and daughter. The daughter asks, “Mom, how many different kinds of willies are there?” The mother smiles and says, “Well, dear, a man goes through three phases also. In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree - mighty and hard. In his 30s and 40s, it’s like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50s, it’s like a Christmas tree.” “A Christmas tree?” the daughter asks.
“Yes, dead from the root up, and the balls are just for decoration.”
Scroll below for more funny jokes!
Husbands Have Their Own Sense of Humor...
Check out these 12 examples of husbands and boyfriends being absolutely hilarious.
Joke: Mom and Dad's New Wife
When a husband's young new bride and his ex-wife are planning to wear the same dress on their wedding day, you know it's a recipe for disaster...
Joke: The Curious Little Girl
When a little girls begins asking her Mom every question under the sun, Mom understandably begins to become annoyed at her. Then, a friend gives her advice...
To Date this Hilarious Father's Daughter, Here are the Rules
While dads may be glad to see their daughter in love, when it comes to fathers and daughters, there are some hard line rules that NO suitor should cross!
This Joke Begins with a Freshly Made Bed.....
When this boy leaves a not for his father, it's nearly enough to give him a heart attack...
Joke: Dad, I Need Money
A college student writes home to ask for money from his dad. Little did he know that his dad would have a rather curt reply...
75 Hilarious Family Jokes Perfect For Kids & Adults!
While some of us might enjoy humor that's a little dark or dirty, these children's jokes are perfect for kids and adults alike!
Uproarious: Please Don't Sit Next to Me, Mr. Bean!
Mr. Bean is back, and this time he's on a plane trying to cheer up a young boy who is feeling a little sick. The results are of course hilarious!
This "Senior Prayer" Made Me Laugh My Butt Off!
A hilarious form of prayer by a senior who knows what she's talking about...
Hilarious: We All Have That One Friend Who's Kinda Silly...
In every group of friends, we have this one friend who just keeps messing up. If your group doesn't have one, then it's probably you...
Hilarious: When Cakes Go Wrong!
These 20 hilarious cakes are just not what the customers were asking for!
Hilarious: These Dogs Never Saw it Coming...
When these dogs get pranked, they can't believe it!
Rodney Dangerfield, The Man of a Million One liners!
Here is a great compilation of some of his best lines and of course - his terrific delivery, Dangerfield style.
What On Earth Were People Thinking When They Did This???
People can get things horribly wrong even when they only have one job. These 27 "you had one job" fails are utterly hilarious.
You're Never Too Old To Have Fun! These Seniors Prove It
There may be some seniors who'd rather take life slowly. But others, do not want to waste a second having fun.
Hilarious: The Funniest Good Morning Quotes in History
Mornings aren’t for everyone. Here are some funny good morning quotes you will relate to.
Hilarious: Some Translations are Too Funny to Correct!
When you're running a business in some far-off land, there's no excuse for not using Google Translate to make a sign. These disastrous results are hilarious!
Watch These Funny Animals Get Into Mischief!
Watch this video compilation of animals and pets getting into funny situations.
These Seniors Live Life According to Their Own Rules...
These funny photos prove that as you get older, you stop caring about what other people think of you.
Librarians Really Do Have a Unique Sense of Humor!
When librarians decide to make us all laugh, they tend to do it in style!
Who Knew Church Signs could be This Funny?
Churches seem to have found that addressing dwindling congregations can be achieved with a great sense of humor. Here are 14 hysterically funny US church signs.
Parrots Are So Funny: A Hilarious Compilation!
This video compilation is all about funny parrots and how they make you laugh.
Classic Comedy: Lucy and the Chocolate Factory
One of the most famous, and funniest, Lucy moments of all time!
Funny Stand Up: Can't Argue With Wife Post Surgery!
Jim Gaffigan in a funny stand up video about arguing with his wife after her brain surgery.
Dogs vs. Their Greatest Enemy: The Bath...
Sorry, my dear canine buddies, you'll still need to take that bath!
Hilarious Fitness Pranks That Will Leave You in Stitches!
Get ready to laugh all day with these hilarious fitness pranks that will have you in stitches.
COMEDY COLLECTION: Giggle at Mr. Bean's Funniest Antics
Mr. bean (Sir Rowan Atkinson) is one of comedy’s most memorable characters. Get your funny bone ready for some serious tickling, as we show you 18 of Mr. Bean's funniest skits ever.
Lost in Translation: 15 Hilarious Language Fails
When translations from foreign languages into English go wrong, apart from being almost incomprehensible, the results are often outrageously hilarious!
Hilarious: This Vet Clinic Has Painfully Funny Signs!
Enjoy 21 hilarious signs brought to you by the most unexpected source - a vet clinic.
14 Grocery Store Signs to Make Your Shopping Funnier!
Chuckle with this super collection of some of the wittiest and funniest signs found inside supermarkets.
These 14 Hilarious Vet Signs Are Gonna Crack You Up!
From unapologetic puns about neutering pets to side-splitting two-liners about the differences between cats and dogs, get ready to laugh your head off!
20 One-Frame Funnies That Will Make You Laugh
This New Yorker cartoonist's works are full of wit and humor.
Need a Smile? These Hilarious Animals Will Bring It Out!
Simply put - there's no funnier comedy than animal comedy!
I Can't Stop Laughing at These Funny Husbands
Check out these 12 examples of husbands and boyfriends being absolutely hilarious.
Hilarious! What It Truly Means to Be a Grandparent
These Hilarious quotes by Gene Perret perfectly sum up life as a grandparent.
The Silliest Construction Mistakes That'll Make You Laugh!
There was very little thought process behind these mistakes...
Simon's Cat Presents: A Day in the Life of a Cat!
This colored episode brings us a day in the life of Simon's Cat. Let's see what that looks like...
We All Make These Mistakes as Parents... Hilarious!
When situations like this happen, we cannot help but giggle. Take a look at these hilarious parenting fails.
Safety Is the Last Thing on Their Minds – Funny Pics
Looking for some humor? Check out some hilarious pictures of safety fails.
Even At a Wedding, Sometimes Things Just Go All Wrong!
Hilarious: Anything Can Go Wrong at a Wedding...
Hilarious: A Most Unusual Sermon!
Rowan Atkinson, the famous comedian, gives a sermon the likes of which you've never heard...
Funny: Best of Paranormal Pranks!
Get prepared to meet vampires, monsters and scary things as you laugh out loud!
Hilarious: If You Love English You'll Love These Puns!
We’ve collected 14 side-splitting jokes and puns that highlight common grammatical mistakes, contain clever twists on words, and more!
Hilarious: When Signs Think You're an Idiot
A collection of signs, articles, manuals and more that are completely obvious and pointless...
22 Of the Funniest Language Jokes and Puns
Time for some humor! Enjoy these 22 grammar puns & jokes.