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The Mathematics of Life

We all studied mathematics in school, but much of what we learnt is not applicable to our day-to-day lives. There is, however, a whole other field of mathematics that we were not taught – the math of life. These are the prime equations and proofs that anyone should know, as they apply to life, love, and the pursuit of happiness.

     
OFFICE ARITHMETIC   1
Smart boss + Smart employee =

Profit

Smart boss + Dumb employee

= Production

Dumb boss + Smart employee

= Promotion

Dumb boss + Dumb employee

= Overtime
     
ROMANCE MATHEMATICS   1

Smart man + Smart woman

= Romance

Smart man + Dumb woman

= Affair

Dumb man + Smart woman

= Marriage

Dumb man + Dumb woman

= Pregnancy 
     
SHOPPING PROOFS   1

A man will pay $2 - for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 - for a $2 item that she doesn't need.


 
General Formulas:

HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man - you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman - you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
 
1
 
LONGEVITY
 
Married men live longer than single men,
but married men are a lot more willing to die.
 
1
 
PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
 
A woman marries a man expecting he will change - but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change - but she does.
 
 
GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
 
woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
(Then she worries about the husband...)
man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who finds such a man.

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
 
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
 
Image/s courtesy of: cooldesign, digitalart, AKARAKINGDOMS, supakitmod / freedigitalphotos.net
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