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Blonde Is What Blonde Does - Hilarious Jokes!

It's not that we actually think blondes are less intelligent, but that the word blonde can mean many things, and the jokes are hilarious! Enjoy a few jokes about our favourite hair color - the blonde!


Three girls all worked in the same office with the same female boss. Each day, they noticed the boss left work early.

One day the girls decided that, when the boss left, they would leave right behind her. After all, she never called or came back to work, so how would she know they went home early?
 
The brunette was thrilled to be home early. She did a little gardening, spent playtime with her son, and went to bed early.
 
The redhead was elated to be able to get in a quick workout at the spa before meeting a dinner date.

The blonde was happy to get home early and surprise her husband, but when she got to her bedroom, she heard a muffled noise from inside. Slowly and quietly, she cracked open the door and was mortified to see her husband fooling around with her boss! Gently, she closed the door and crept out of her house.

The next day, at their coffee break, the brunette and redhead planned to leave early again, and they asked the blonde if she was going to go with them.

No way!” the blonde exclaimed. “I almost got caught yesterday!

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There was a blonde who found herself sitting next to a Lawyer on an airplane. The lawyer just kept bugging the blonde wanting her to play a game of intelligence. Finally, the lawyer offered her 10 to 1 odds, and said every time the blonde could not answer one of his questions, she owed him $5, but every time he could not answer hers, he'd give her $50.00. The lawyer figured he could not lose, and the blonde reluctantly accepted. 

The lawyer first asked, "What is the distance between the Earth and the nearest star?

Without saying a word the blonde handed him $5. then the blonde asked, "What goes up a hill with 3 legs and comes back down the hill with 4 legs?

Well, the lawyer looked puzzled. He took several hours, looking up everything he could on his laptop and even placing numerous air-to-ground phone calls trying to find the answer. Finally, angry and frustrated, he gave up and paid the blonde $50.00 

The blonde put the $50 into her purse without comment, but the lawyer insisted, "What is the answer to your question?" 

Without saying a word, the blonde handed him $5.
 
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A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.

Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?

How about 50 dollars?” said the blonde.

The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man’s wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, “Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?”

The man replied, “She should. She was standing on the porch.”

A short time later the blonde came to the door to collect her money.

You’re finished already?” he asked.

Yes,” the blonde answered, “and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats.

Impressed, the man reached into his wallet for the 50 dollars.

And by the way,” the blonde added, “that’s not a Porsche; it’s a Ferrari!

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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

Hysterically the blonde responds to the husband, “Shut up! you’re next!” 
 
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A blonde lived with two blonde room mates. She bought a new car, and on the way home from the dealer got caught in a terrible hail storm. Her brand new car was dented all over.

When she got home she called the service department to ask what she should do. The service chief, being a prankster, told her to wait till the car was cool and then blow hard on the tail pipe, which would pop out all the dents.

A half-hour later her roomies saw her on her knees behind the car, blowing as hard as she could. They asked what the heck she was doing and she told them, adding in a perplexed tone “But it's not working”. “You dummy” one of her blond room mates said. “You have to roll up the windows first.
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