Wife

Don’t Mess With Women: A Hilarious Collection of Jokes

Why is there nothing more frightening than a woman's revenge? The next funny joke collection will teach you exactly why.

Joke: Two Women Hit It Off In Arizona

A wise woman gets a lift from a younger woman while walking out in the Arizona desert. It isn't long before they get talking...

This Joke Starts With a Man On His Deathbed

A man lies on his deathbed, surrounded by his wife and four children. Three are tall and athletic, but the fourth... isn't. He asks his wife about them...

This Joke Starts With a Man Working Late

A businessman works late to be with his young secretary, but eventually makes his way home. He begins to think up his excuses...

Who Knew That Coffee Could Cause Arguments? (Funny Joke)

A husband and wife are having an argument over who should brew the coffee. Little does the husband know that his wife already has the argument won...

Joke: A Thieving Old Lady Finds Herself Facing a Judge

An old lady finds herself in front of a judge after stealing a can of peaches. He immediately hands down a sentence for her wicked deed...

Funny: It's Not My Fault That You Didn't Use Them, Pal

When a husband and wife on a long car journey decide to stop overnight, little did they imagine the shock they were in for when receiving their bill...

Hilarious: My Wife's Weird Tangents Get My Back Up

When a couple decides to go on a backpacking holiday, the husband isn't too happy. Listen to his hilarious musings about the trip.

Have You Heard These Jokes? It's a Funny Wife...

If you have a wife, you may just agree with these short but priceless jokes.

Joke: Wedding Decisions

A bride and a groom are with a pastor finalizing details for their wedding day. The pastor asks them whether they want a traditional or contemporary wedding...

Joke: The Marriage Seminar Went Wrong

This Joke Starts With a Couples Special Seminar...

Joke: The Maid and the Wife

A cheeky joke about a maid who wants a raise...

Joke: These Newlyweds Can't Get Enough

Homer and Darlene are countryside newlyweds. They can't get enough of each other, but their nooner is taking too long. The town doctor proposes a useful solution...

Joke: It's Difficult to Fulfill a Dying Wish Sometimes

When a window visits an undertaker to see how preparations of her dead husband's body are going, she isn't happy with what she sees. A solution is proposed...

This Joke Begins With a Lost Couple...

This couple washed up on a deserted island...

Joke: The Fortune Teller and the Bad News

A sneaky woman decides to visit a fortune teller when she's in New Orleans

Joke: Putting Your Private Part Right Is Gonna Cost

When a doctor is tasked with fixing a rabbi's mangled manhood, he explains that there's a variation in price depending on the size...

These Polish Short Jokes Are Hilarious

When we say Polish, we don't mean people from Poland! We all know these 'Polish' people, who always complain but never do anything about it, who always nag and never seem to be happy. Enjoy this collection of hilarious 'Polish' jokes!

Joke: The Old Golf Partner

When a husband and wife are discussing golf, the husband is surprised at her suggestion of a golfing buddy for him. But he soon realizes she has a point...

This Joke Starts With a Huge Family Waiting For a Bus

A blind man vies for a seat on a bus with a family with nine children. Inevitably, he and the husband do not make it on due to overcrowding. An argument ensues.

Joke: Mom and Dad's New Wife

When a husband's young new bride and his ex-wife are planning to wear the same dress on their wedding day, you know it's a recipe for disaster...

This Joke Starts With a Greedy Man...

A stingy lawyer simply isn't willing to let go of the money he has earned - even in death. That's why he hatches to plan to prove that you can take it with you.

Joke: This Man Really Needed to Confess Something...

A woman is holding a candlelit vigil at her husband's bedside when he tells her that he has a confession to make...

Joke: Come On, Honey...

A newlywed steps out of the shower and is promptly asked to pose for a nude photo by her husband. She wants one of him in return...

Joke: Drunken Lies

This joke begins with a very drunk man thinking he can outwit his wife.

Joke: Putting the Foot Down

When Joe and Bob are doing some work together, Bob notices how much Joe fusses over his wife. He asks him what's going on...

Joke: The Panty Rule

A newlywed couple are about to consummate their wedding night when the husband decides to lay down the law. He couldn't predict what would happen next...

Joke: How Do I Look?

This woman is having some body image issues, and her husband thinks that he has the perfect response...

Joke: Funniest Lines in History!

“The cardiologist's diet: If it tastes good - spit it out.“

Joke: The Sad Husband and the Curious Wife

A guy comes home from work and he is clearly upset.

Joke: The Complete Bar Experience

An angry wife was complaining about her husband spending all his free time in a bar...

Joke: Be Like Bubba (Rude)

A football coach noticed that his star tackle, Bubba, had so many women hanging around that he couldn’t possibly handle all of them.

Joke: Whose Panties Are These???

A wife goes on a retreat for work for a few days. Upon her return...

Joke: His Wife Has Needs...

This joke begins with a husband being surprised by his wife's sudden need for...

Joke: The Weirdest Tattoo Request (Rude)

This rude joke begins with a man walking into a tattoo parlor with a weird request.

Joke: A Bored Husband in Target

This joke begins with a wife getting a letter from Target about her husband's behavior...

This Joke Begins With a Seductive Wife...

This joke begins with a wife seductively asking her husband a question...

Great Joke: The Bartender and His Very Low Prices

This joke begins with a man getting much cheaper drinks than he anticipated...

Have You Heard This Joke? You MUST See the Circus!

The circus is coming to town and it's the perfect time for a brand, silly new joke!

Funny Joke: One, Two Three and You're Ready to Go!

This joke begins with an old man going to see a witch doctor

This Joke Begins With a Divorce Judge Having a Bad Day

This joke is about a divorce judge who interviews a bizarre woman.

This Joke Begins With a Couple Going to a Strip Club

This joke involves a wife who takes her husband to a strip club for what she thinks is the first time...

Great Joke: It's Serious Business at the FBI

This joke begins with the FBI looking for a new assassin...

This Joke Begins With a Husband Coming Home From Work...

This joke begins with a husband coming home to his wife...

This Joke Starts With a Very Drunk Man...

This joke begins with a very drunk man thinking he can outwit his wife.

Joke: Making This Call About a Wedding is a Tough Decision

A bride and a groom are with a pastor finalizing details for their wedding day. The pastor asks them whether they want a traditional or contemporary wedding...

This Joke Starts With Door-to-door Research Being Done

A man is doing door-to-door research on behalf of a petroleum jelly manufacturer when he a very beautiful housewife opens up her front door for him...

This Joke Starts With Two Dogs Mating in Someone's Yard

Two guys are riding in a car when their conversation turns to their respective sex lives. One proposes alcohol as a method of getting more action...

This Joke Starts With a Man Being Rushed to Hospital

Mr. Steinberg is rushed to hospital having suffered a heart attack. His wife wants a doctor's note for her to sleep with him after surgery...

Hilarious: It Can Be Difficult Getting a Straight Answer...

A woman is in front of a judge giving answers about her pending divorce, but she seems to have trouble giving a straight answer...

This Joke Starts With an American Man Buying a Pig

An American man decides to stop off at a farm in the Deep South in order to buy a pig. Things soon start to get weird...

Hilarious: What On Earth Has Gotten Into the Minister?

A minister gives a talk to the Lions Club on sex, but things quickly start to unravel...

This Joke Starts With a Black-eyed Guy Boarding a Plane

Two men sit next to each other on a flight. They both notice that they have black eyes, and the conversation immediately turns to that...

This Joke Starts With a Husband and Wife Talking in Bed

A husband and wife are having a discussion in bed, but it isn't quite about what it seems at first...

This Joke Starts With Two Men Playing a Quick 18 Holes

Two men are attempting to get in a quick round of golf when they are held up by two women. One of the men decides to give them the hurry-along...

This Joke Starts With an Old Pastor Looking For His Collar

A pastor is looking for his collar in his closest when he comes across a box that he had never seen in there before...

Hilarious: Let Me Try and Use This Password

A woman is helping her husband to set up his new laptop. He decides to enter a new password, but the laptop doesn't seem to be interested...

Joke: Man Goes to a Psychiatrist About a Bossy Wife

A man visits a psychiatrist due to his bossy wife. The psychiatrist promptly tells him not to allow her to do so. He heads home with a new attitude.

I Promise It'll Be Yours One Day, Honey (Hilarious Joke)

A husband and wife are walking down the street when the wife spots a diamond necklace in a jewelry store window. Sadly, he doesn't have the cash to buy it...

What On Earth Is He Doing to That Cow? (Hilarious Joke)

A farmer is attempting to milk a cow, but she's just completely unruly and not having any of it. He soon resorts to tying her limbs up, but...

This Joke Starts With a Man Wanting to Take It With Him

A stingy lawyer simply isn't willing to let go of the money he has earned - even in death. That's why he hatches to plan to prove that you can take it with you.

Joke: Everything Seems to Be Going Wrong Today

When Joe and Bob are doing some work together, Bob notices how much Joe fusses over his wife. He asks him what's going on...

This Joke Starts With News of a Divorce to the Kids

An elderly Miami man calls his kids with news of a divorce from their mother, but all isn't as it seems...

This Joke Starts With a Woman At the Pearly Gates

When a woman arrives at the Pearly Gates before she enters Heaven, St. Peter makes her undertake a challenge...

Hilarious: Don't Worry Honey, He's On His Way

A woman is playing a round of gold with her husband when he has a heart attack. Luckily, it seems that there's a doctor on the course...

This Joke Starts With a Wife Deciding That She Looks Old

This woman is having some body image issues, and her husband thinks that he has the perfect response...

Hilarious: I'm Going "Fishing" With My Boss, Honey

A man tells his wife that he's off on a fishing trip to Canada with his colleagues and his boss in order to bag himself a promotion...

This Joke Starts With a Man Riding In the Back of a Cab

A man is catching a cab home when he realizes that the cab driver could give him a hand with catching his cheating wife. Things escalate quickly...

This Joke Starts With a Woman Speaking to a Congregation

A woman takes the mic during Mass and begins to tell the congregation of her husband's terrible ailment. Not surprisingly, the congregation is horrified...

This Joke Starts With Two Doctors Making House Calls

The old doctor is showing the new doctor around and introducing him to the people he treats. The young doctor is surprised at how quickly he diagnoses...

It's Difficult to Fulfill a Dying Wish Sometimes (Funny)

When a window visits an undertaker to see how preparations of her dead husband's body are going, she isn't happy with what she sees. A solution is proposed...

A Couple Get Into Bed On Their Wedding Night (Joke)

A newlywed couple are about to consummate their wedding night when the husband decides to lay down the law. He couldn't predict what would happen next...

This Joke Starts With a Doctor and His Wife Arguing

A doctor and his wife are having a massive argument over breakfast, but he soon has to head out for work. He never expects what happens next...

This Joke Starts With a Drunk Irishman Driving His Car

An Irishman has had a bit to drink, but decides to get behind the wheel anyway. It isn't long before he's pulled over by a cop in hot pursuit...

Rabbi, My Wife Is Trying to Poison Me. What Should I Do?

A man is concerned about his wife poisoning him, so he seeks out a Rabbi's advice.The Rabbi's response is rather surprising...

This Joke Starts With a Woman Visiting the Fortune Teller

A sneaky woman decides to visit a fortune teller when she's in New Orleans

Hilarious: Putting Your Private Part Right Is Gonna Cost

When a doctor is tasked with fixing a rabbi's mangled manhood, he explains that there's a variation in price depending on the size...

Joke: This Woman Won't Let Her Husband Sleep in Church!

This woman's husband won't stop sleeping during church, so the minister comes up with a genius idea to prevent it...

A Wife Isn't Happy About An Unexpected Guest (Funny)

A husband decides to invited his friend over for dinner, but it's at the last minute. As one can image, his wife isn't happy at all...

Hilarious: A Husband and His Honest Opinion

This woman asks her husband for an honest opinion regarding how old she looks...

How to Make a Policeman Laugh So Hard He Lets You Off

When this husband is caught speeding, he knows the perfect thing to say.

Hilarious: Wife Turns the Tables on Her Deadbeat Hubby

When a wife asks her husband to fix little things around the house, she gets a response she doesn't like. So

Funny: The Doctor's Advice Gets This Old Woman in Trouble

Who knew that such a small pill could get someone into so much trouble...

Hilarious! Will She Be 10th Time Lucky in Love?

A woman explains to her new husband how she is still a virgin despite having been married a whopping ten times.

Hilarious! How Do You Explain Marriage to a Priest?

Every couple has their own idea about the secret to a long marriage. But this old fellow, Giuseppe, probably takes the prize for the most novel one!

Indecent Behavior: That's Not the Way to Conduct Yourself!

Waitresses see some shocking behavior from courting couples, but tonight's spectacle was extraordinarily indecent...

Hilarious: A Hard Worker, the Strip Club & the Angry Wife

When a wife decides to treat her hardworking husband to a visit to the strip club, she had no idea that it would turn out the way that it did...

My Testimony: How I've Loved Each Decade of My Life...

We all fear growing old a little, but this insightful letter from a BabaMail reader shows that comfort can be drawn from every decade we live through.