Joke: Doctor, Give Me Money!
That'll be $150. " For more funny jokes scroll below. Joke: The Quack and the Opportunist funny jokes, medical jokes, long medical jokes, doctor jokes, long doctor jokes, funny doctor jokes, best doctor jokes This joke starts with a quack making a big promotion...
Joke: The Abusive Patient and the Patient Doctor
A Doctor Overhears a patient being rude to the staff. After some time passes where the patient, an older gentleman, was yelling and cursing at them, the patient enters the doctor's office. He immediately complains to the doctor about a cold he has. The doctor simply asks for him to open his mouth.
This Joke Begins With a Young Doctor New to Town...
A young doctor moved out to a small community to replace an older doctor who was retiring. The older doctor suggested that the young one accompany him on his house-call rounds, so the community could become used to a new doctor.
Joke: The Unorthodox Doctor
A woman went to her doctor's clinic. She was seen by one of the doctors, but after about 4 minutes in the examination room, she burst out screaming and ran down the hall. One of the younger doctors stopped her and asked what the problem was, and she explained.
Joke: Going to the Doctor
He said, "I'm going to the doctor." And she said, "Why, are you sick?" "No" he said, "I'm going to get me some of those new Viagra pills." So his wife got up out of her rocker and was putting on her sweater and he said, "Where are you going?" She said, "I'm going to the doctor, too." "Why?"
Joke: The Crafty Doctor
A Chinese doctor can't find a job in a hospital in the US, so he opens his own clinic and puts up a sign outside. It reads: 'GET TREATMENT FOR $20 - IF NOT CURED GET BACK $100.' An American lawyer thinks this is a great opportunity to earn $100 and goes to the clinic.
Joke: American Doctor vs. Chinese Doctor
Joke: The Chinese Doctor joke While in China, an American single man acts promiscuous and does not use protection the entire time he is there.
Joke: The Doctor's Waiver
Joke: The Doctor's Waiver joke The medics rushed Mr. Steinberg to the hospital in the middle of the night, apparently due to a massive heart attack.
Joke: The Doctor's Plant
Content Joke: The Doctor's Plant joke Two doctors, Dean and Gable, are treating a man with lung disease...
Joke: A Blonde at the Doctor's
A blonde woman came in for a routine physical at the doctor’s office. “There you go," said the nurse as she handed her a urine cup. “The bathroom is over there on your left. The doctor will see you in a few minutes.” A few minutes later the lady came out of the bathroom.
Joke: An Expert on Doctors
Content Joke: The Doctor Expert joke One night a man and a woman are both at a bar knocking back a few beers.
Joke: The Doctors' Opinions
Content Joke: The New Hospital Wing joke A panel of doctors was asked for their opinions concerning a proposal to build a new wing to their hospital...
Joke: Doctor's Friendly Advice
A man goes to the doctor with a long history of migraine headaches. When the doctor goes over his history and does his physical, he discovers that the poor guy has tried practically every therapy known to man for his migraines and STILL sees no improvement.
Joke: Calling Up the Doctor
A distraught senior citizen phoned her doctor’s office. "Is it true," she wanted to know, "that the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life?" "Yes, I’m afraid so," the doctor told her.
Joke: An Old Snake at the Doctor's
An old snake goes to see his doctor and says, ”I need something for my eyesssss… I can’t see very well these daysssss.” The doctor fixes him up with a pair of glasses and tells him to return in two weeks. The snake comes back in two weeks and tells the doctor that he’s very depressed.
Joke: Doctor, What Do I Have?
He goes to see his doctor and is immediately rushed to the hospital to undergo tests. The man wakes up after the tests in a private room at the hospital, and the phone by his bed rings. "This is your doctor.
This Joke Starts With a Doctor and His Wife Arguing
A doctor and his wife were having a big argument at breakfast. Things in the bedroom hadn’t been good for a while, so they were going at it over that. "You aren't so good in bed either!" he shouted and stormed off to work. He began his working day, and didn’t hear a peep from his wife.
Joke: Playing Golf With Your Doctor
"Don't worry dear," says the wife calmly, "they found a doctor on the second hole and he's coming to help you." "Well, how long will it take for him to get here?" he asks feebly. "No time at all," says his wife. "Everybody's already agreed to let him play through."
This Joke Starts With a Chinese Doctor Opening a Clinic
A Chinese doctor can't find a job in a Hospital in the US, so he opens his own clinic and puts up a sign outside. It reads: 'GET TREATMENT FOR $20 - IF NOT CURED GET BACK $100.' An American lawyer thinks this is a great opportunity to earn $100 and goes to the clinic.
Doctor, Help Me - Hilarious Doctor Shorts!
10 hilarious 'doctor, doctor' jokes that will guarantee a lifting of the mood! "Doctor, I can't stop thinking I'm actually a dog." Doctor: " OK, come sit on this couch and lets discuss it." "But I'm not allowed up on the couch!" "Doctor, I can't seem to stop my hands from shaking all the time!"
This Joke Starts With Two Doctors Making House Calls
A young doctor had moved out to a small community to replace a doctor who was retiring. The older doctor suggested the young one accompany him on his rounds so the community could become used to a new doctor. At the first house a woman complained, "I've been a little sick to my stomach."
Joke: Sometimes Even Doctors Don't Have a Clue...
After his exam, the doctor said to the elderly man, “You appear to be in good health. Do you have any medical concerns you would like to ask me about?” “In fact, I do,” said the old man.
Joke: Doctor, What Are You Going to Do With My Husband?
The patient's wife anxiously rushed up to the doctor after the examination and was told of the diagnosis and the need for surgery. "How long will he be on crutches?" she asked. "Crutches???" the doctor asked. "Well, yes," the woman said, "You are going to lengthen his legs, aren't you?"
Joke: Doctor, I Need Help With My Husband
An elderly lady went to the doctor and asked for his help in reviving her husband’s passion. “Why don’t you give him Viagra?” the doctor asked. “Oh, no,” the woman replied. “He doesn't even take aspirin for a headache!” “That’s not a problem,” the doctor told her.