Predict Jokes

Forget about the past, you canโ€™t change it. Forget about the future, you canโ€™t predict it. Forget about
the present, I didnโ€™t get you one.
I wanted to be a professional fortune-teller but I wasn't very good at it. I could only predict when there would be bad winter storms. Well, turns out I had been using a snow globe.
How can colors be used to predict the weather?
By their huemidity.
What word backwards can predict the future? Cookies (Seikooc as in psychic of you say it).
How did the monster predict his future?
With the horror-scope!
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