I knew a vampire who became a poet. He went from bat to verse.
I knew a vampire who was trying to become an actor. He gave it his best shot, but ended up retraining. He just couldn't find a role he could sink his teeth into.
Whosever room this is should be ashamed! His underwear is hanging on the lamp. His raincoat is there in the overstuffed chair, And the chair is becoming quite mucky and damp. His workbook is wedged in the window, His sweater’s been thrown on the floor. His scarf and one ski are beneath the TV, And his pants have been carelessly hung on the door. His books are all jammed in the closet, His vest has been left in the hall. A lizard named Ed is asleep in his bed, And his smelly old sock has been stuck to the wall. Whosever room this is should be ashamed! Donald or Robert or Willie or— Huh? You say it’s mine? Oh, dear, I knew it looked familiar! (Shel Silverstein)
I once knew a man who lived in a jar. For a stranger sight you’d have to go far. I asked him once why he lived in a jar. He grimaced and said, how bizarre you are. My jar’s so cozy, warm and bright, Even in the full moonlight. The only drawback is, you see, Getting out quickly when I have to pee. (Irwin Mercer)
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