Please stop with all the corona jokes. I‘m sick of it.
What movie perfectly describes the corona virus? No country for old men.
Girl, are you the Wuhan Corona Virus? Because you’re taking my breath away.
What do Saturday and Sunday have in common with the corona virus? The weakend.
Me: I'll have a Corona please.
Me: Thank you.
If Corona virus is just a beer virus.. Then it’s just a yeast infection!
Tom Hanks just got the Corona virus. They had to lock the whole Cast Away.
Don't worry, the Corona Virus won't last long... It was made in China.
Corona crisis reaches new level: Iran out of toilet paper.
Woke up with sweats afraid I'd contracted the corona virus... Changed into jeans and was all good.
Why can't corona virus jokes go viral? Because people are laughing into their elbows.
With Corona Virus spreading, I never thought our deaths will also be.. “Made in China”
Dad jokes are like Corona. Everybody gets It but not everyone can laugh about It.
I'm using a bra for a face mask. I like to keep abreast of corona security measures.
With all this talk of Corona Virus, the people who make sanitising gel are rubbing their hands together.
While it’s taking a while for the Corona virus to reach other countries, China got it right off the bat.
As the local drunk, I'm quite worried about the corona virus. It's got potential tequila lot of people.
A man walks into a bar and goes up to the bartender and says "I'll have a Corona please, hold the virus."
John Travolta has been diagnosed with the Corona Virus. He had chills that were multiplying.
Corona virus is just like pasta. The Chinese invented it but the Italians will spread it all over the world.
Ok, so if the Corona Virus isn't about beer, why do I keep hearing about cases of it?
I broke up with my girlfriend after she contracted the corona virus I’ve decided to wash my hands of her.
Corona virus has caused our local supermarket to sell out of pasta. All because of a fusilli people.
Why are people buying so much toilet paper because of the corona virus? Because when one person sneezes, 100 people shit themselves.
Why did the Chinese communist party try to cover up the outbreak of the corona virus disease? They were afraid not everyone could get it.
I really hope corona virus can't spread through s*x It would be so lonely being the last man on Earth.
I got really good at telling them, so I’m being crowned the king of corona virus puns. You’re all formally invited to attend my coronation.
I went to the chemist today and asked the assistant "what kills the Corona Virus?"
She replied to me "Ammonia Cleaner"
I said "Oh, I am sorry, I thought you worked here."
People with a cold - "I just want to stay in bed and do nothing, I feel terrible."
People with Corona Virus - "I feel terrible, I think I will go skiing in Austria, visit the Eiffel Tower and maybe do some white water rafting in Camino de Santiago."
This Corona virus is a blessing My wife doesn't want to travel anywhere.
She no longer buys anything online, since everything comes from China.
she doesn't go to the mall to avoid the crowds.
she spends all of her time in a mask with her mouth closed.
Best thing that has ever happened to me.
She Wants Me
A quarrel broke out between a man and a woman while traveling for dinner at a restaurant. They quarreled almost all the way and just before they arrived, the wife said to the husband: "You are very lucky to have me, no other normal woman will want you!".
The frustrated husband decided to prove to his wife that she was wrong and find women who would be interested in him already during dinner. The hostess who led them to the table smiled at the husband endlessly, laughed at his jokes and even offered to take his coat, so of course as soon as she left he turned to his wife with a triumphant look on her face.
"Don't get too excited, it's just her job and she's married too."
"How do you know?"
"Because I saw a ring on her finger."
A short time later the husband had to go to the bathroom, and on his way back he collided with the chair of a woman sitting alone at a nearby table. He apologized, ordered her a drink at his expense, talked to her for a few moments and sat down with his wife again. "Just so you know, she invited me to sit down for a drink with her!"
"Don't get too excited, she's probably half blind."
"How do you know?"
"Because I saw her enter the restaurant with a walking stick."
After a few minutes a waitress went to the table and as she took the order from the couple it was obvious that she was staring at her husband and flirting with him.
"Here! You see?!" He said to his wife after the waitress left, "There are normal women who want me!"
"Don't be an idiot, she has corona."
"How do you know?"
"Because if she's interested in you then she has no sense of taste!"