Welcome to hell, if hell had a really twisted sense of humor (which it probably does). These are terror, horror and just pretty f**cked up to be honest. You sure you want to continue? Alright, consider yourself warned, as we cross the gates into Dark Short Jokes...

What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus? It only takes one nail to hang a picture of Jesus.
They laughed at my crayon drawing...
I laughed at their chalk outline.
Even after a decade or two, I think we will all remember this year forever.
I mean, hindsight is 2020.
What do you call a hospital ward full of epileptic vegetables?
Seizure salad.
Girl, are you the Wuhan Corona Virus?
Because you’re taking my breath away.
What do you get when a raven flies into a group of 18 crows?
Corvid-19.
You don't need a parachute to go skydiving, you know...
You need a parachute to go skydiving twice.
I was going to make a joke about losing your senses due to COVID.
But I decided it was poor taste.
This Corona virus is a blessing
My wife doesn't want to travel anywhere.

She no longer buys anything online, since everything comes from China.

she doesn't go to the mall to avoid the crowds.

she spends all of her time in a mask with her mouth closed.

Best thing that has ever happened to me.
Life is like a box of chocolates... mostly disappointing.
What does a doctor use to cover his mistakes?
Dirt.
Every day, I think of my grandfathers last words...
“Is that loaded?”
My teen daughter was sent home from school for covid exposure.....
She’s now my quaranteen.
The government announced that because of COVID, we can have gatherings of up to 5 people without issues.
Where the hell am I going to find 5 people without issues?
We are 11 days into self-isolation ands it is really upsetting me to witness my wife standing at the living room window gazing aimlessly into space with tears running down her cheeks.
Don’t get me wrong, I empathize with her. I’ve considered letting her in many times, but rules are rules.
So Stephen Hawking walked into a bar... just kidding.
A man walks into a bar and goes up to the bartender and says "I'll have a Corona please, hold the virus."
Don't worry, the Corona Virus won't last long... It was made in China.
What do you get if you cross Islam and Capitalism?
No more jokes about the profit.
I feel really bad for the class of 2020. They say the year really flies by.
I just didn’t realize it would Zoom.
“I’m sorry” and “I apologize” mean the same thing.
Except at a funeral.
Dad jokes are like Corona.
Everybody gets It but not everyone can laugh about It.
So a guy is walking with a young boy into the

After a while the boy says: "Hey mister its getting dark out and I’m scared.”
“How do you think I feel?" Said the stranger. "I have to walk back alone."
Turns out my dad who’s a locksmith still has to go to work during lockdown.
He’s a key worker, you see.
Dolly Parton partially funded Moderna's COVID Vaccine.
It comes in two very large dosey-doses.
It's only kamikaze if it came from the Kamikaze region in Japan...
Otherwise it's just plane suicide.
Always drink apple juice.
Because OJ will kill you.
Where did Lisa go during the bombing? Everywhere.
Corona crisis reaches new level:
Iran out of toilet paper.
Flat earthers fear 6 feet social distancing could push some people over the edge.