They say that life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it, meaning, our attitude is what affects our level of satisfaction and happiness in life. Most of us have probably already figured this out, but the problem begins when we try to change our attitude - it is under our control, but what changes should we make in order to be happy and to move forward toward our goals and desires?
We've collected 9 things for you that you may find hard to hear, but you need to be aware of - once you change your attitude in these areas, you’ll take a few steps toward your true and personal happiness in life.
We all have a tendency to put ourselves at the center and see conversations or situations from points of view that relate to us, and this has a big impact on our lives, whether it causes us to be hurt by others’ rude behavior, to feel sorry for ourselves if things don’t go as planned, or to doubt ourselves when we realize we aren’t perfect. However, the world doesn’t work that way - it just seems that it does. If you perceive yourself feeling like a victim, try to think of a way to help the people around you. When you do this you can stop perceiving yourself as the center of the world, and in this case, it will greatly benefit your soul.
We all have feelings of anger, sadness, frustration, disappointment, and remorse that occasionally come over us, but at the moment it happens to you, take a minute to really examine the emotion and think about a case from your near or distant past that has made it stronger. Your brain may insist that the pain you feel now is caused by what is happening now, but what happened in the past isn’t taking place in the present - it is behind you. With that being said, the pain still exists because subconsciously you’re busy telling yourself an old story about yourself or about your world.
Most people make themselves unhappy because they refuse to accept what is happening in their lives right now, but when we accept reality, painful as it is, we allow ourselves to grow and heal. In the end, happiness is not a total lack of problems, rather it exists as long as we have the ability to deal with these problems. You don’t have to concentrate on what the world takes from you, rather focus on how you manage with what you still have.
There are things that shouldn’t stay in our lives to the end, and yet you may well not want changes to take place, but life is always in motion and it is natural and necessary. Saying goodbye to someone we've been close with can be the hardest thing to do, as well as getting back in touch with someone we haven’t talked to in a long time, which can leave us vulnerable and uncomfortable. Either way, change is not easy, but in the long run, it is the only thing that will help you develop and even be happy. So, remind yourself that changes take place all the time, and they can always be for the best in the end.
Too many people are wasting their time waiting for the right moment to come, but it never does. The reason for this is that we forget that the path of life has been laid before us by walking it and not by waiting for it. There is no need to wait for self-confidence before taking the first step since it will come only after it and thanks to it. Do not let others tell you what you want or need to do, and shape your journey while you travel it yourself.
No one wants to feel uncomfortable, so most of us run away from that feeling regularly. The problem with this is that escape from discomfort causes us to take part only in activities that are within our comfort zone, and since this is naturally a limited and relatively small field, we miss many experiences that should be part of our lives. Take for example the desire to diet - first of all we fain weight, for example from eating unhealthy food at night, while at the same time staying fit is something that is “uncomfortable" for us, so we don’t do it.
We continue to eat more to compensate for the negative emotions we experience as a result of weight gain and continue to try to correct the emotions by buying things that we don’t really need or even becoming couch potatoes in front of the T.V to forget our thoughts. However, in the end, not only will none of this help, it’ll only exacerbate the situation because what really needs to be done is what felt uncomfortable at first. A little discomfort at first can lead to great things in the future.
You're not perfect and that's fine. Despite what the small, annoying voice in your head says, you can disappoint people and still get affection and love from those who really love you, and you can fail at something and still be smart, capable and talented. If you expect yourself to be perfect, you will set yourself a high and unrealistic bar that will only cause you to experience confusion and frustration. Forget your standards of perfection and remember that others will still love you even if you disappoint them or fail, so you should love yourself unconditionally as well.
One of the biggest challenges that accompany us throughout our lives is to live within our minds. We use work or relationships that are harmful to us to escape from ourselves and from the reality in which we live, and in fact, many of us avoid being alone even for the shortest time. The reason is that being alone with ourselves exposes us to our true feelings, however, only if you allow yourself to dive into these emotions can you begin to recover from what is hurting your soul.
You’ll not always be at the top of other people's priorities, so you should be your number one priority. Learn how to respect yourself and take care of yourself and become your own shoulder to lean on. Your needs are important, so start supplying them to yourself. Don’t wait for others to choose to give you happiness the way you want them to, give yourself the gift of happiness without expecting anyone's permission - only you are responsible for your life.