header print

One Liners: Finding a Job

It's a hard job market out there! I've tried all kinds of jobs but I've never been able to hold on to one for more than a month. Don't believe me? Let me count the various jobs I've had over the years and the excuses I got getting fired. I tell you, it isn't easy being me!

For example...

1. At my first job I was working in an orange juice factory,  
But I got canned. I just couldn't concentrate.


2. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack,
But I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.


3. After that, I tried being a tailor, 
But I wasn't suited for it - mainly because it was a sew-sew job.

funny lines bunny laughing
4. Next, I tried working at Starbucks,     
But I had to quit because I got tired of the same old grind.  


5. Then, I tried being a chef - I figured it would add spice to my life, 
But I just didn't have the thyme.


6. Next, I tried working in a deli,  
But any way I sliced it, I just couldn't cut the mustard. 


7. My best job was as a musician,
But I eventually found I wasn't noteworthy.

  funny lines cute laughing drawn bear

8. I studied for a long time to become a doctor,  
But I didn't have any patience.


9. Next up was a job in a shoe factory - I tried hard,
But I just didn't fit in. 


10. After that, I became a fisherman,  
But I discovered I couldn't live on my net income.


11. Next, I managed to get a job at a pool maintenance company,
But the work was too draining. 


12. So after that I got a job at a workout center,     
 But they said I wasn't fit for the job. 

funny lines laughing drawn bear


13. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a historian,
 But I realized there was no future in it.


14. My last job was when I tried working in a muffler factory,  
But that was too exhausting. 


So, I tried retirement!

funny lines old couple on swings
And I Found I'm PERFECT For the Job!

 

Scroll below for more funny jokes!

Sign Up Free
Did you mean:
By clicking "Join", you agree to our Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy
Related Topics: funny, joke, humor, one liners, puns, punny
Sign Up Free
Did you mean:
By clicking "Join", you agree to our Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy