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Wide Jokes

Funny Limericks
There was a Young Lady whose eyes,
Were unique as to colour and size;
When she opened them wide,
People all turned aside,
And started away in surprise.
There was a Young Lady whose eyes,
Were unique as to colour and size;
When she opened them wide,
People all turned aside,
And started away in surprise.
Roses are Red Violets are Blue Jokes
Roses are red,
The earth is wide,
You’d look much better,
With me by your side.
Cowboy Jokes
A lady sees a cowboy and says "are you really a cowboy?" The cowboy says "why yes mame, born and raised right here in Montana and have worked on the ranch since I was knee high to a pup."

The woman says " I've always wondered why cowboys always wear those big hats." The wide brim keeps the sun off'aya when it's hot and the rain off'aya when it rain'n."

"Why do you all wear vests?" Well mame, it keeps ya warm when it's cold but it leaves your arms free for rope'n and work'n."

"What about the chaps? " "They keep the burrs and brambles off'a ya."

She says "that all makes perfect sense, but what I don't understand is why you'd wear tennis shoes."

"Aww, that's easy, that's so folks don't mistake us for TRUCKERS!"
One Liners for Kids
How do spiders communicate? Through the World Wide Web.
Bread Puns
That wide loaf has a decent bread-th. Nice.
Funny Haiku
World is vast and wide.
So much out there to explore.
Right now, let's eat lunch.
Couch Puns
I tried to build myself an armchair, but I messed up some of the measurements and made it too wide.
So near, and yet sofa
Football Puns
Hope you’re wide open on [date].
Funny Marriage Quotes
“Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.”—Benjamin Franklin
River Puns
I once dreamt of crossing a wide river...
But it ended up being just a ferry tale.