Necessary Jokes

My wife is fed up of my constant Dad jokes, so I asked her, "How can I stop my addiction?"
Wife: "Whatever means necessary!"

Me: "No it doesn't.”
"We must both, I’m afraid, recognise that, as we grow older, we become like old cars – more and more repairs and replacements are necessary." - C.S. Lewis
She'll take whatever beans necessary to get her daily cup of coffee. Whatever. Beans. Necessary.
“People are living longer than ever before, a phenomenon undoubtedly made necessary by the 30-year mortgage." ~Doug Larson
I'm giving away a free legless parrot.
No perches necessary.
I'm giving away my legless parrot, no perches necessary!
“Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.“
Bill Murray
Hey kids! I went back in time and formed a British 80s pop group called The Vaccine!
And now The Cure is no longer necessary!