Viagra

What happens when you give a politician Viagra? He gets taller.
Why do they give men Viagra in the old folks home?
To keep them from rolling out of bed.
I've been taking Viagra for my sunburn.
It doesn't cure it but it keeps the bed sheets off my legs at night.
That Little Pill
That Little Pill A senior couple decides to try viagra for the first time ever. They have an incredible night together. In the morning, the wife asks her husband at breakfast time, "Would you like some bacon and eggs, a slice of toast, and maybe some grapefruit juice and coffee?" He declines. “Thanks for asking, but, I'm not hungry right now. It's this Viagra," he says. "It's really taken the edge off my appetite." At lunchtime, she asks him if he'd like something. "How about a bowl of soup, homemade muffins, or a cheese sandwich?" He declines. "The Viagra," he says, "really trashes my desire for food." Come dinner time, she asks if he wants anything to eat. "Would you like a juicy rib eye steak and some scrumptious apple pie? Or maybe a rotisserie chicken or tasty stir fry?" He declines again. "No," he says, "it's got to be the Viagra. I'm still not hungry." "Well," she says, "Would you mind letting me up? I'm starving!"
A Dentist With a Sense of Humor
A Dentist With a Sense of Humor The other day, a gentleman went to the dentist's office to have a tooth pulled. The dentist pulls out a freezing needle to give him a shot. "No way! No needles! I hate needles", the man said. The dentist starts to hook up the laughing gas and the man immediately objected. "I can't do the gas thing either; the thought of having the gas mask on is suffocating me!" The dentist then asks the gentleman if he has any objection to taking a pill. "No objection", the man said. "I'm fine with pills". The dentist then returns and says, "Here's a Viagra tablet". The gentleman, totally at a loss for words, said in amazement, "WOW, I didn't know Viagra worked as a painkiller!" "It doesn't", said the dentist, "but it will give you something to hold on to when I pull your tooth."
A Severely Sunburned Man & an Odd Prescription
A Severely Sunburned Man & an Odd Prescription A guy fell asleep on the beach for several hours and got horrible sunburn, specifically to his upper legs. He went to the hospital, and was promptly admitted after being diagnosed with second-degree burns. With his skin already starting to blister, and the severe pain he was in, the doctor prescribed continuous intravenous feeding with saline, electrolytes, a sedative, and a Viagra pill every four hours. The nurse, who was rather astounded, asked, "What good will Viagra do for him, Doctor?" The doctor replied, "It won't do anything for his condition, but it'll keep the sheets off his legs."
What's the difference between the first honeymoon and the second?
First honeymoon, Niagara. Second honeymoon, Viagra.
Do you know what the generic name for Viagra is?
Mycoxafloppin.
Have you heard the one about the lesbian that took Viagra? She couldn't get her tongue back in her mouth for a month.
Did you hear about the guy who died of a Viagra overdose? They couldn't close his casket.
The Dentist and the Viagra
The Dentist and the Viagra The other day, a gentleman went to the Dentist's office to have a tooth pulled. The Dentist pulls out a freezing needle to give him a shot. "No way! No needles! I hate needles", the man said. The Dentist starts to hook up the laughing gas and the man immediately objected. "I can't do the gas thing either; the thought of having the gas mask on is suffocating me!" The Dentist then asks the gentleman if he has any objection to taking a pill. "No objection", the man said. "I'm fine with pills". The Dentist then returns and says, "Here's a Viagra tablet". The gentleman, totally at a loss for words, said in amazement, "WOW, I didn't know Viagra worked as a pain killer!" "It doesn't", said the Dentist, "but it will give you something to hold on to when I pull your tooth."
Will You Stop It?
Will You Stop It? The nurse asked a patient to remove his clothing and put on a gown to be checked by the doctor. "In front of you?" He asks shyly. The nurse says: "Well no, but I've seen the naked human body before. The man said, "Not one like mine. You'd die laughing at my naked body." "Of course I won't laugh," said the Nurse to the patient, "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient.” "Okay then," said the patient, and he proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing a huge male body with the smallest adult male organ the Nurse had ever seen in her life. In length and girth it was almost identical to an AAA battery. Unable to control herself, the Nurse tried to stop a giggle, but it just came out. And then she started laughing at the fact that she was laughing. Feeling very badly that she had laughed at the man's private parts, she composed herself as well as she could. "I am so sorry," she said, "I don't know what came over me. On my honor as a Nurse and a lady, I promise that it won't happen again. Now, tell me, what seems to be the problem?" "It's swollen," Bob replied. She ran out of the room.