How do fish play the drums?
With Fish Sticks.
What do fish take to stay healthy?
Fish take Vitamin Sea to stay healthy!
Whale, whale, whale…
If it isn’t a pod.
Why did the fish blush?
Because it saw the ocean's bottom.
What is the difference between a fish and a piano?
You can’t tuna fish.
What is a dolphin’s favorite TV show? Whale of fortune.
Who does a fish call when his piano breaks?
The piano tuna!
Did you hear about the crab who went to a seafood disco?
He pulled a mussel.
What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
‘I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand!’
How do you circumcise a whale?
You send down four skin divers.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A fsh.
What sea creature never tells the truth
A lion fish.
How do you confuse a fish?
Put the fish in a round fishbowl and tell it to go to the corner.
How to fish like to eat cereal?
In a fish bowl!
What do you call a lazy crayfish?
A slobster.
What’s in the middle of a jellyfish?
A jelly button.
What did the fish say when he posted bail?
I’m off the hook!
How do you make a goldfish old?
Take away the “G”!
How do fish get high?
Seaweed.
What do you call a fish with two knees? A two-knee-fish!
Why did the girl pour glue into her fishbowl?
She wanted to make a fish stick!
Why do fish live in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze.
Why are goldfish orange?
The water makes them rusty.
Why are some fish at the bottom of the ocean?
Because they dropped out of the school.
Why is it easy to spot a Cinderella-fish? They have glass flippers!
Jellyfish have survived for 650 million years despite not having brains.
This gives me hope for the next generation.
What do sea monsters eat?
Fish and ships.
Why did the fish cross the road?
The chicken had the days off!
Why couldn’t the clownfish buy a house?
The fish could not buy a house because he didn’t have an-e-mon-e!
What kind of horse can swim underwater without coming up for air?
A seahorse.
What would you call a jellyfish combat veteran?
A man o' war.
Where do fish go to watch movies?
At the dive-in.
What do you get if you cross an abbot with a trout?
A monkfish.
What’s the coldest fish in the sea?
A blue whale!
Why are fish so smart?
They are always in schools!
What’s the easiest way to catch fish? Have someone throw it at you!
What kind of whale can fly?
A Pilot whale.
What do whales do when they get angry?
They blow up and then let off steam.
What did the fish say when it swam into a brick wall?
Dam!
How does a group of sea turtles make a decision?
They flipper a coin.
Are Jellyfish sad that there are no Peanut Butter fish?
Why are mice afraid of the water?
Because of catfish.
Why don’t oysters share their pearls? Oysters don’t share their pearls because they’re shellfish!
How do shellfish get to the hospital?
In a clambulance!
What fish are at the zoo?
Lion fish!
My wife got stung by a jellyfish and said, “Quick, pee on it!” So I peed on it and said…
“That’s for stinging my wife!”
What do fish use to weigh themselves?
Scales!
Which sea creatures cry the most?
Whales!
How do you get two whales in a car?
Start in England and drive west.
Why do fish not like computers?
Because they are worried about getting caught in the Inter-net.
Go to BabaMail
