What do you call a bear with a bad attitude?
The bearer of bad news.
What do you call a cemetery for bears?
Bearial grounds.
Why don’t bears eat fast food?
Because it’s hard for them to catch.
What does pooh eat at parties?
Blue bear-y pie.
What do you call bears with no ears?
B.
What do you call a bear who practices dentistry?
A molar bear.
How did the grizzly walk in the snow?
Bear footed.
How do bears keep their houses cool in summer?
Bear conditioning.
What do you call a grizzly bear who gets caught in the rain?
A drizzly bear.
Where do the teenaged polar bears go to dance?
To the snow-ball.
Why did the two bears break up at the North Pole?
They were polar opposites.
If I ever find out the name of the surgeon who messed up my limb transplant, I’ll kill him…
With my bear hands.
Which animal can hibernate while standing on its head?
Yoga Bear.
What cheese do you use to get a bear out of a tree?
Camembert.
What do you call two polar bears jerking each other off?
Bipolar.
What is a bear’s favorite drink?
Koka-Koala.
What is a bear’s favorite soda?
Coca Koala.
Goldilocks was killed last night.
The killers did it with their own bear hands.
Why is it cheap to feed polar bears?
Because they live on ice only.
Why do bears have fur coats?
Because they look silly wearing jackets.
What do you call a Mexican bear with a rubber toe?
Robearto.
What do you call a bear without any teeth?
A gummy bear.
I’ll think of another pun soon…
Just bear with me.
How do you stop a bear from charging?
Take away its credit cards.
How can you tell when a polar bear is moving?
There’s a “fur sale” sign in the yard.
Have you ever had a dream about a bear eating you?
I call them bite-mares.
What kind of car do bears drive?
Fur-aris.
What do you get if you cross a skunk with a bear?
Winnie the PU!
Where do polar bears keep their money?
In a snow bank.
What do grizzlies use in the shower?
Bear conditioner.