A beautiful blonde woman is having trouble growing tomatoes... seems she can't get them to turn red.
She knows it is not the weather or the soil as the man next door has a garden full of big red tomatoes. She asks him about his secret..."twice a day" he says "I stand
naked in front of the tomatoes, they blush and turn bright red."
This sounds foolish, but what the heck, so she spends the next few days standing nude in her garden. A week goes by and she runs into her neighbor and he asks...
"have your tomatoes turned red?"
"Not really" she says..."but the strangest thing has happened... the cucumbers have swollen up and are standing on end."