Then the Mexican opens his lunch pail and he gets a burrito, he says, 'if I get one more burrito for lunch I'm gonna jump off this building!'
The blond man opens his lunch pail and gets a bologna sandwich. He says, 'if I get one more bologna sandwich I'm gonna jump off of this building!'
The next day the Irish man opens his lunch pail and finds cabbage and beef so he jumps off the building to his death.
Then the Mexican opens hid lunch pail and finds a burrito so he jumps off the building to his death.
Then the blond guy opens his lunch pail and finds a bologna sandwich, so he jumps off to his death as well.
The next day at their funeral the Irish man's wife said, "If I only knew he was sick of cabbage and beef I would have packed him something else." Then the Mexican's wife then said, ''If I only knew he didn't like burritos, I would have packed something else.''
Finally, the blond man's wife said, "I don't know what his problem was! He packed his own lunch!''
A blond guy gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed, sweating and panting. "What happened?!?" he says in panic. "I'm having a heart attack!" cries the woman.
He rushes downstairs to grab the phone, but just as he's dialing, his 4-year-old son comes up and says,"Daddy! Daddy! Uncle Ted's hiding in your closet and he's got no clothes on!"
The guy slams the phone down and storms upstairs into the bedroom, past his screaming wife, and rips open the wardrobe door. Sure enough, there is his brother, totally naked, cowering on the closet floor.
"You rotten bastard," says the husband. "My wife is having a heart attack and you're running around naked and scaring the kids!!!"
A blind guy sits down at a bar and shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blond joke?"
In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something. Our bartender is blond, the bouncer is blond. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2, weighs 225 pounds and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blond. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
"Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
For more funny jokes scroll below.
Here are the Most Confusing Pictures Seen Online This Year
Some photos just leave you scratching your head until you figure out what's going on. Here are 15 of the most confusing photos seen on the internet in 2018.
Men Have the Oddest Way of Going About Things Sometimes...
Men really do some odd things, to the point where some are led to believe that they actually come from another planet! Take a look at these hilarious photos.
Joke: HOW Could it Be Worse?
A guy runs into an old school friend on the street. The friend immediately begins talking about his financial troubles...
Joke: The Power of the Thermos
A blond is in a store when a Thermos catches her eye. She begins to ask questions about it and eventually makes a purchase...
Joke: Wedding Decisions
A bride and a groom are with a pastor finalizing details for their wedding day. The pastor asks them whether they want a traditional or contemporary wedding...
This Hilarious Sign is Gaining Notoriety Around the World...
The Indian Hills Community Center sign in Colorado, USA, has gained a worldwide following thanks to the hilarious puns it displays. Here are 30 of them.
30 Hilarious Babies Who Look More Like Seniors!
Newborns are adorable... but these babies look a lot older than their actual age.
Every Species Has Its Comedians...
There's nothing better than animals to make us smile and laugh!
To Date this Hilarious Father's Daughter, Here are the Rules
While dads may be glad to see their daughter in love, when it comes to fathers and daughters, there are some hard line rules that NO suitor should cross!
These Pics Were Taken Just One Second Before "Disaster"
These hilarious photos were taken a split second before “disaster” struck.
Classic Comedy: A Newly Graduated Dentist...
Laugh your socks off with this classic comedy sketch from the Carol Burnett Show. A hilarious scene from the dentist that will have you in stitches.
Classic Comedy: The Grammar Nazi
This comedy sketch begins with a standard business meeting, but the boss has a real problem with people's language...
Classic Comedy: The Marx Brothers' Famous Mirror Scene
One of the most famous and adored comedy routines of all time performed by the talented Marx Brothers!
This Amusing Prank Involves a Frying Pan...
This prank video starts with a pan falling from up high...
Hilariously Funny DIY Fixes (16 Pics)
These hilarious pictures show some of the most unique DIY botch-jobs.
12 Hilarious Photos of Dogs Letting Cats Boss Them Around
It's just so funny to watch cats and dogs interact with each other, especially when dogs are being bossed around by cats! See for yourself in these hilarious photos
Hilarious: This is Why We Love Kids...
There are a number of reasons we love kids! It isn't just because they laugh out loud most of the time or look great in photos - they also make us laugh...
Marriage Can Be Such a Funny Kind of Affair...
A few fascinating thoughts and quotes about the institute of marriage...
Who Said God Isn't Funny? These Church Signs are Hilarious!
Although churches are houses of worship, that doesn't mean to say that they can't have a sense of humor! These amazing signs are evidence of that.
Mrs Brown Does a Hilarious Strip Tease - for the Vicar!
After being hypnotized the night before, Mrs Brown is unaware that she is still under the spell. The vicar is coming round for tea. What could go wrong?
When Cats Attack, Absolutely Nothing is Safe!
These Photos are filled with cats going into attack mode and assaulting everything from their devoted owners to innocent cardboard boxes, blankets, and shoes.
This Rude Prank Will Have You Screaming With Laughter!
When the a gag team sets up a secret love affair between a priest and a couple of nuns, the resulting chaos that ensues will make you scream with laughter!
Never Thought Bathroom Signs Could Be So Funny! (Rude)
These hilarious bathrooms signs are sure to make your trip to the little boy's or girl's room much more enjoyable!
Hilarious: The Evil Grocery Store!
This is just the kind of pranks I like, and a very creative use of a grocery store!
WATCH: Man Ditches "Pregnant" Wife In Hilarious Prank
A man pretends to ditch his "pregnant" wife for another woman in this hilarious prank. Watch the video to see the hilarious expressions on bystanders' faces.
Hilarious! Men Can Handle Anything Impossible!
Hilarious photos illustrating how men are willing to do just about anything!
This is What Happens When You Try and Fix it Yourself!
Have you ever tried fixing something yourself and failed miserably? Then you're going to love these photos...
These Funny Signs Made Me Holler!
Feeling sad or bored? After reading these 12 side-splitting signs, you will no longer have those two problems on your hands.
17 Unexpected Objects With Friendly Faces!
These smiling fungi and friendly dressers are here to lift your spirits!
The Most Hilarious Way of Learning to Play an Instrument!
Part comedy, part musical lesson, you'll laugh yourself silly with this video.
15 Witty Doormats That'll Make You Grin!
When was the last time you thought about your doormat? These 15 mats will make you wish your home had more doors.
Hilarious: When Timing and Comedy Team Up!
Comedy is all about timing and these photos are the perfect example for it!
Hilarious! Mr. Bean Didn't Expect This at Art Class!
Mr. Bean takes an art class but never did he expect that he'd have to be drawing a naked woman...
Classic Comedy: It's Not Easy Being a Conductor!
This hilarious and musical comedy sketch will leave you both delighted and laughing!
No Matter My Age, a Funny Cartoon is a Funny Cartoon
These cartoons will make you laugh at any age.
Hilarious: These "translators" Should Quit Their Job...
This is hilarious!! See These Signs in ENGLISH!!
If You Don't Laugh at These, You Are Irony-Deficient...
The Irony Is Strong in These Photos...
Arrest These Designers! 20 Cases of Design Faux Pas
From ashtrays labelled with 'No Smoking' signs to lemons that can supposedly produce orange juice, you've got to see these 20 hilarious design fails!
When Parking Signs Get a Sense of Humor! (15 Pics)
Who knew no parking signs could make us laugh too?
These Dumb Actions By People Will Leave You Aghast
Some people do things that simply leave you scratching your head - and make you laugh. Take a look at 22 pictures of the dumbest actions you'll ever see.
Hilarious: This Just May Be Why Building Codes Exist...
20 examples of the worst construction flaws, that will hopefully remind you to hire a professional next time.
Hilarious: Old Ladies Know How to Ask the Best Questions...
Old ladies have some of the most poignant and relevant questions to ask of any of us. Here are a few of them!
You Must See These Hilarious Airport Pick-Up Signs
Some people go a little overboard with their airport greetings.