Then the Mexican opens his lunch pail and he gets a burrito, he says, 'if I get one more burrito for lunch I'm gonna jump off this building!'
The blond man opens his lunch pail and gets a bologna sandwich. He says, 'if I get one more bologna sandwich I'm gonna jump off of this building!'
The next day the Irish man opens his lunch pail and finds cabbage and beef so he jumps off the building to his death.
Then the Mexican opens hid lunch pail and finds a burrito so he jumps off the building to his death.
Then the blond guy opens his lunch pail and finds a bologna sandwich, so he jumps off to his death as well.
The next day at their funeral the Irish man's wife said, "If I only knew he was sick of cabbage and beef I would have packed him something else." Then the Mexican's wife then said, ''If I only knew he didn't like burritos, I would have packed something else.''
Finally, the blond man's wife said, "I don't know what his problem was! He packed his own lunch!''
A blond guy gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed, sweating and panting. "What happened?!?" he says in panic. "I'm having a heart attack!" cries the woman.
He rushes downstairs to grab the phone, but just as he's dialing, his 4-year-old son comes up and says,"Daddy! Daddy! Uncle Ted's hiding in your closet and he's got no clothes on!"
The guy slams the phone down and storms upstairs into the bedroom, past his screaming wife, and rips open the wardrobe door. Sure enough, there is his brother, totally naked, cowering on the closet floor.
"You rotten bastard," says the husband. "My wife is having a heart attack and you're running around naked and scaring the kids!!!"
A blind guy sits down at a bar and shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blond joke?"
In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something. Our bartender is blond, the bouncer is blond. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2, weighs 225 pounds and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blond. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
"Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
For more funny jokes scroll below.
Joke: I'm Sure That This is the World's Best Invention
A soldier, sailor and an airman are discussing what they think is the best invention in the world. One of them mentions a thermos...
Joke: Don't Drink and Jump
A man and a woman are drinking in a bar at the top of the Empire State Building. The man soon makes a startling revelation...
Sometimes, It's the Stupidest Jokes That Are the Funniest!
A joke can be so stupid that you just burst into fits of laughter as soon as you hear it. Here are 16 jokes that are so stupid, they're just funny.
Joke: When the Evangelicals Are On TV
When grandma and grandpa are watching the evangelical preacher on the TV, they try to heal themselves of their ills by touching it. It doesn't go so well...
Joke: The Newlyweds and the Strict Priest...
These newlyweds were asked to do something difficult...
Hilarious: If You're Going to Insult, Do It With Style...
you did not want to get on Shakespeare's bad side, for you might get one of these...
Hilarious: 22 Witty and Clever Cartoons!
22 of the funniest New Yorker cartoons that are just clever enough to be funny but not mysteriously so.
Hilarious: The Silliest Things in Life are FINALLY Explained
I have never seen more accurate and hilarious assessments of our daily lives, then these simple graphs.
These Mistranslations are Too Funny Not to Share
Enjoy this hilarious collection of ridiculousy bad translation fails.
20 Hilarious Comics Filled With Wit, Fun, and Humor!
These hilarious comic strips by legendary cartoonist Mark Parisi are guaranteed to make you chuckle.
Hilarity Ensues When This Ventriloquist Takes the Stage
Watch ventriloquist Jack Williams deliver an incredible audition in America's Got Talent with his puppet!
Whoever Created These Funny Signs Deserves a Pay Raise!
These hilarious business signs will definitely tickle your funny bone.
WATCH: 10 Funny Xmas Editions of 'Simon's Cat' All in One!
These hilarious cartoons from Simon's cat serve to remind us not to forget something really important: It's Christmas for our cats too!
The Funny Difference Between Male & Female Brains
If you're a man, or if you're a woman, you will probably find this video compilation utterly hilarious.
Watch Simon's Cat Deal With a Very Friendly Doggie
In this episode of Simon's Cat, the cat must contend with an enthusiastic and friendly dog.
Hilarious: You'll Only See THIS in Scotland!
Every country has its own quirks and oddities, Scotland may be one of the weirdest countries in Europe, and we have photographic proof!
Hilarious: These Funny Restaurant Signs Cracked People Up
Whenever people drove by these fast food joints, they were stopped in their tracks by their hilarious signs. Take a look.
Hilarious: If You Love English You'll Love These Puns!
We’ve collected 14 side-splitting jokes and puns that highlight common grammatical mistakes, contain clever twists on words, and more!
Excuse Me, But Are These Signs for REAL?!?
Who comes up with these hilarious ideas and useless ideas for signs?
When Kid Photos Don't Come Out the Way You Hoped...
Click to see the outcome of kids who did not want to have their photos taken.
It’s Hard to Believe These Hilarious US Laws Still Exist!
Did you know California prohibits riding bikes in swimming pools? Discover more such bizarre US laws in this article.
How a Golden Retriever Stole the Show & Won My Heart!
Watch how one golden retriever takes the Finnish obedience show without hesitation.
These Funny Illustrations Show What Life Is Like With Kids!
Jim Benton is a cartoonist and illustrator who has managed to capture life with young kids perfectly. Take a look at his hilarious drawings.
These Funny One-Liners Are Utterly Hilarious
These monsters are out to make you giggle. They've got no less than 20 one-liners to share with you, and we bet you'll be in fits of laughter in no time.
These Vintage Cartoons Will Make You Scream With Laughter!
If you're looking for a good laugh, then these snarky vintage illustrations by artist Anne Taitor have certainly got your covered!
These Dumb Actions By People Will Leave You Aghast
Some people do things that simply leave you scratching your head - and make you laugh. Take a look at 22 pictures of the dumbest actions you'll ever see.
In Need of a Good Laugh? Check Out These Signs
Some shopkeepers have a hilarious sense of humor. Read these funny signs here!
These Comics Prove a Single Panel Can Deliver Big Laughs
Enjoy this hilarious collection of single-panel comics by Adam Douglas Thompson.
Have You Heard Disco, the Chattiest Little Parakeet?
Disco is never short of words to say, in fact, he never stops rabbiting away, coming out with all manner of curious and hilarious phrases.
The Senior Alphabet is Absolutely Hilarious!
They usually use the ABC poem to teach kids the alphabet, but now they've put out a senior version.
For a Giant Smile, Check Out These Hilarious Cartoons!
If you love cartoon stripes then you came to the right place. Enjoy this collection of funny cartoons that are sure to make your day funnier and your step lighter.
When Funny Signs Meet Epic Fails, Hilarity Ensues...
These funny signs, tags, and maps show just how much the people responsible for creating them had failed, and it's absolutely hilarious!
What the Heck Was Going On in These 25 Photographs!
Sometimes you just have to throw you hands up and ask: 'what the hell are all these people in the photos were thinking?'
This May Be the Funniest Message I've Ever Heard...
This has to be the funniest hotline message ever recorded.
These Funny Shop Signs Are Absolutely Outrageous!
These shop signs prove that many shopkeepers still have a healthy sense of humor!
Some Animals are True Comedians...
Who knew wildlife could be this funny? Here are 13 of this year's funny wild animal award nominees.
Every Species Has Its Comedians...
There's nothing better than animals to make us smile and laugh!
Hilarious: 19 Times the Universe Decided to Be Ironic...
These photos capture the most brilliant comedic irony caught on camera!
Hilarious: 15 Signs You Love Coffee Just a Bit Too Much
This is how you can tell if you don't just like coffee, but love it!
Laugh Out Loud with Rob Spence's Crazy Balloon Act
Watch in awe as Rob Spence's balloon mime act takes center stage, bringing non-stop laughter.
The Most Hilarious Way of Learning to Play an Instrument!
Part comedy, part musical lesson, you'll laugh yourself silly with this video.
HIALRIOUS: But Why????
Discover a collection of 35 different 'Why' jokes that are bound to make people of all ages giggle.
Hilarious: The Evil Grocery Store!
This is just the kind of pranks I like, and a very creative use of a grocery store!
You Must See These Hilarious Airport Pick-Up Signs
Some people go a little overboard with their airport greetings.
Laugh Until You Cry with Mr. Bean's Ridiculous Antics
Enjoy 600 seconds of the most hilarious Mr. Bean moments that will leave you in stitches.