Passion is the essence of desire. It makes life feel good! Unfortunately, passion often fades in a long-term relationship especially as life gets predictable (and at times, boring). While this is a normal phase within most relationships, we should, by no means, resign ourselves to a passionless love. After all, if we expect our relationship to last, passion must play a role too. It keeps us intrigued, interested and motivated.
If passion has faded in your relationship, here are 10 essential tips that you could try to feel passion once again.
Rather than going out together, meet at a restaurant or date venue. Before you lived together this is what you would have done, back when you still had knots of excitement in your stomach.
Passion often dwindles because we expect one person to be everything to us: our best friend, business partner, co-parent, lover, house cleaner and handyman. But the more roles we put a person in, the more diluted the relationship becomes. Bear in mind that one person cannot be everything to you. Above all else, treat your partner like your lover, not your roommate.
While this may seem difficult if you have children, try to get some time alone every now and then. Explore a new city, sleep in a new bed, go on an adventure!
Contrary to popular belief, it's probably better if your partner doesn't know everything about you. We often think that being intimate involves sharing every little detail. Yet while intimacy is about sharing the vulnerable parts of yourself with another person (it will undoubtedly produce a feeling of deep connection in your relationship) divulging every little detail is not being vulnerable, rather, it's providing too much information. Mystery helps keep your relationship alive. Consciously decide what to share and what to keep to yourself.
While this may sound contradictory, space is a necessary component for fueling passion in a relationship. When we take space from the people we love, we inevitably long to be close to them again. Consciously incorporate space into your relationship, heating things up again.
Touching brings about feelings of comfort, support and arousal, both physiologically and psychologically. It doesn't need to be much either. Holding hands on a walk, or hugging and kissing your partner, to remind them that you are physiologically bonded.
Add some spark to your relationship by sharing an activity that neither of you have tried before. Studies show that sharing an activity that is novel and exciting can increase your sense of passion.
Studies have shown that the arousal that's created through an adrenaline-producing activity, can transfer to your partner and relationship. A vigorous hike, a roller-coaster ride or even watching a scary movie all generate adrenaline. In doing these activities together, your brain will be fooled into believing that the arousal produced through doing something new and exciting is really tied to your relationship.
Making eye contact while being intimate can enhance your emotional connection. Completely let go and allow yourself to enjoy being in the presence of your partner.
Life can get pretty busy at times, so make it a point to bond whenever you can. One idea could be to bond while you are getting ready. The bathroom, for instance, may also be seen as an intimate and sensual space. As you go about your usual routine, spice things up a little bit by wearing attractive underwear, for instance, while you are both getting ready.