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The Mathematics of Life

 We all studied mathematics in school, but much of what we learnt is not applicable to our day-to-day lives. There is, however, a whole other field of mathematics that we were not taught – the math of life. These are the prime equations and proofs that anyone should know, as they apply to life, love, and the pursuit of happiness.
 
OFFICE ARITHMETIC
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Smart boss + Smart employee    =    Profit
Smart boss + Dumb employee    =    Production
Dumb boss + Smart employee    =    Promotion
Dumb boss + Dumb employee    =    Overtime
        

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS         
Smart man + Smart woman    =    Romance
Smart man + Dumb woman    =    Affair
Dumb man + Smart woman    =    Marriage
Dumb man + Dumb woman    =    Pregnancy 
SHOPPING PROOFS    
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A man will pay $2 - for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 - for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

 

General Formulas:

HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man - you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman - you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

LONGEVITY
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Married men live longer than single men,
but married men are a lot more willing to die.

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change - but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change - but she does.

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
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A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
(Then she worries about the husband...)
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who finds such a man.


DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

Cover Image courtesy of Depositphotos

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