"I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?"
"About 32," was the reply.
"Nope! I'm exactly 50," the woman said happily.
A little while later she went into McDonald's and asked the counter girl the very same question.
The girl said, "I guess about 29."
The woman replied, "Nope I'm 50."
Now she was feeling really good about herself. She stopped in a drug store on her way down the street. She went up to the counter to get some mints and asked the clerk this burning question.
The clerk responded, "Oh, I'd say 30."
Again she proudly responded, "I am 50, but thank you!"
While waiting for the bus to go home, she asked an old man waiting next to her the same question.
He replied, "Lady, I'm 78 and my eyesight is going...
"Although, when I was young, there was a sure way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra. Then, and only then, can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are."
They waited in silence on the empty street until curiosity got the best of her.
She finally blurted out, "What the hell! Go ahead."
He slipped both of his hands under her bra and began to feel around very slowly and carefully. He bounced and weighed each one of her bosoms. He gently pinched them as well. He pushed her assets together and rubbed them against each other.
After a couple of minutes of this, she said, "Okay, okay...How old am I?"
He completed one last squeeze, removed his hands, and said, "Madam, you are 50."
Stunned and amazed, the woman said, "That was incredible! How could you tell??"
"I was behind you in line at McDonald's."
This Joke Starts With a Middle-aged Lady Going to Hospital
A woman suffers a heart attack and ends up in hospital. She has a near-death experience, but awakens. She decides to get some work done...
Hilarious: Can I Have a Penny For Your Thoughts, Lad?
A Scottish lad and lass are sitting on a heathery hillside in the Highlands when they begin to converse...
Cheeky Joke: Meeting the Parents
A biker just found himself the perfect Harley with a tube of Vaseline thrown in to protect it from the rain.Things start to go awry at his girlfriend's house...
Joke: To Heaven and Back
A woman suffers a heart attack and ends up in hospital. She has a near-death experience, but awakens. She decides to get some work done...
Why Has It Gone Hard? (Hilarious Joke)
Two boys are playing by a stream when they see a naked woman. One of the boys quickly runs off.
Receptionist, You Must Come Quickly (Hilarious Joke)
A receptionist is alerted to the presence of a man outside the window of an old lady who's staying at the hotel. She goes to investigate the problem...
Hilarious: I Can't Believe People Can Really Carry This Much
These guys have taken overload to the next level. How on earth can they carry this much?
These Photos Will Leave You Doing a Double-Take!
There are some photos that will just leave you doing a double-take thanks to their perfect timing and odd composition. Take a look at these 18 surreal photos.
Hilarious: These Christmas Cartoons Made Me Laugh Out Lo
This is the best time of the year to laugh all together as a family with these Christmas funnies.
This Man Pushed a Button. He Had No Idea What It Will Do...
This man saw a button at the town square, he didn't realize what would happen when he pushed it.
These House Design Decisions Are Criminally Bad!
It’s hard to believe these weird houses actually exist!
Hilarious! Some Animals Cannot Pose Well in Photos
Here are some majestic and graceful animals, captured in less than fluttering moments.
These Have to Be the Most Oddly Specific Signs Ever Made
Laugh out loud at these hilariously specific signs that will leave you wondering who exactly they were made for.
These Silly Photos Remind Us of the Funny Side of Christmas!
Christmas is always full of good cheer, but it can also be downright hilarious as well. Here are 20 memes to remind you how hilarious Christmas Can Be.
Weirdly Interesting Family Photoshoots - 14 Funny Pics
These family photos are embarrassing but hilarious.
Hand These Guys a Towel and Get Ready to Laugh!
This hilarious performance involves two young Frenchmen who have just a towel apiece to preserve their modesty. Watch this side-splitting performance.
This Prank is Something Quite Magical!
A levitating woman is rudely interrupted by a kid... hilarious!
Simon's Cat: A Day in the Life of a Cat Owner
Being a cat owner really changes you as a person, only cat people understand this. But everyone will get the humor in this new extended Simon's Cat episode!
Animals Bring So Much Joy Into Our Lives - & Make Us Laugh
There's no doubt that animals bring great joy to many people, not least by making them laugh. Take a look at these 15 funny animals doing their thing.
Funny Photos: These Delivery Men Have an Odd Way of Working
We all enjoy getting a package in the mail, don't we? It's not always so straightforward though. These 20 delivery fails well have you laughing out loud.
Arrest These Designers! 20 Cases of Design Faux Pas
From ashtrays labelled with 'No Smoking' signs to lemons that can supposedly produce orange juice, you've got to see these 20 hilarious design fails!
These Wacky Racoons Are Here to Make You Laugh Out Loud!
With all their quirky deviousness, craftiness, and charisma, these raccoons are here to steal your heart!
14 One Liners That You Can Use to Amuse!
14 one liners that will make any party a lot of fun and get everyone laughing.
Comedy Gold: Enjoy This Rib-Tickling Laurel & Hardy Clip
Enjoy this hilarious clip from a Laurel and Hardy short titled ‘The Snow Hawk’.
Hilarious: When Timing and Comedy Team Up!
Comedy is all about timing and these photos are the perfect example for it!
10 Minutes of the Funniest Food Pranks!
10 minutes of pure prank fun with food pranks by Just For Laughs.
This Demonstration Went Really Wrong. LOL.
These people just didn't know their own strength!
These Adorable Yet Funny Snapchats of Dogs Are a Must-See!
These snapchats of dogs are both funny and cute.
Eek! Remember When Chaplin Got Trapped in the Lion's Cage?
This classic scene has me rolling around the floor every time...
With These Witty Lines Anyome Can be Star of the Party
some funny sayings with a something for everyone.
HILARIOUS: 15 Dogs that are Having a Really Funny Day
New dog toys are hilariously giving dogs a shiny new smile that will crack you up.
If You Have a Well Aged Sense of Humor, You'll Love This!
We've collected for you a series of the most funny senior cartoon pictures. I'm still laughing at these 'well aged' cartoons!
Laughter Guaranteed: 15 Uproarious Classical Art Memes
Who would have thought that classical art pieces can make you cackle with laughter?
Beware of These Signs! They Trigger Uncontrollable Laughs
This fresh batch of hilarious signs is not to be missed!
Hilarious! Quick, Your Majesty, Avoid Mr. Bean!
It's hard to imagine why the Queen would ever want to meet Mr. Bean. I mean, I know he's funny, but...she's the Queen! This will not end well!
You'll Never Guess How THIS Video Ends...
This hilarious short film won countless awards and endless praise.
Try to Wrap Your Head Around These 17 Optical Illusions
Don’t trust your eyes! These mind-bending photos aren’t as bizarre as they seem at first, but they will try to mislead you...
Laugh Until You Cry with Mr. Bean's Ridiculous Antics
Enjoy 600 seconds of the most hilarious Mr. Bean moments that will leave you in stitches.
These Dogs Clearly Overestimated Their Physical Abilities...
Watch the hilarious video collection of dogs who fail at being dogs.
These Dry-humored Comic Strips Are Utterly Brilliant
If you've never seen Pie Comic by John McNamee before, then you need to take a look at this post. His comic strips are hilarious!
HILARIOUS: The Office Can Be a Funny Place!
Four short and funny jokes about office and business situations!
Ah the Hilarious Ways We Men Try to Solve Our Problems
When it comes to health and safety, these men have left their brains at home. Faced with some tricky challenges, they have tried to solve them in funny ways.
FUNNY: 51 "Chinese" Proverbs the Chinese Never Thought About
These proverbs aren't really Chinese, but they're still really funny! In fact we're willing to bet they'll make you laugh out loud! Enjoy!
You're Busted! Hilarious 'Crime' Gags
This compilation is so funny it should be illegal! ).
Hilarious! These Kids REALLY Hate Shopping!
While loads of teenagers and adults simply love to shop till they drop, the same can't really be said for most kids, as these hilarious photos prove!
Sometimes All You Need is One Line to Make You Laugh...
28 hilarious and short jokes! Read them all at once or come back and read one every day, no funny business