A sweet and innocent young Italian girl gets married, but the girl's mother lives downstairs. The girl has never made love to a man before, and on their wedding night, when he takes off his shirt, she goes running downstairs.
"Momma, Momma," she cries. "I can't believe it! He has hair all over his chest! What should I do?"
The mother is making spaghetti sauce. She stirs the sauce thoughtfully and says, "Hair on his chest? He's your husband, it's your wedding night, go upstairs."
When the girl gets back upstairs, the man takes off his pants. This sends her running back down to her mother:
The mother stirs the sauce thoughtfully and says: "Hair on his legs? He's your husband, it's your wedding night, go upstairs."
The girl goes back upstairs, and the man takes off his shoes and socks. She looks down and sees that half of one of his feet is missing. She goes crying back down the stairs:
"Momma, Momma! He's got a foot and a half! What should I do?"
The mother hands her daughter the spoon and says:
"A foot and a half? Here, you stir the sauce. I'll go upstairs."