The other night I was invited out for a night with the 'girls.' I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, 'I promise!'
The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, I told him 'MIDNIGHT'... he didn't seem angry in the least.
Whew, I got away with that one!
Then he said 'We need a new cuckoo clock.'
When I asked him why, he said, 'Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said 'oh cr*p.' Cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another three times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table and passed wind."