Marriage can be sweet or sour, the most beautiful gift and the most horrible torture. Whatever it is, it definitely is a big part of life and as such has created some great thoughts and quotes. Here are some of my personal favorites! |
Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success.
Jim Backus
I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.
David Bissonette
I’ve sometimes thought of marrying, and then I’ve thought again.
Noel Coward, 1956
A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.
Zsa Zsa Gabor
I’m an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.
Zsa Zsa Gabor
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
Sacha Guitry
Marriage is like pi - natural, irrational, and very important.
Lisa Hoffman
She’s a lovely person. She deserves a good husband. Marry her before she finds one.
Oscar Levant to Harpo Marx upon meeting Harpo’s fiancee
Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.
Jackie Mason
Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out.
Montaigne
After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can’t face each other, but still they stay together.
Hemant Joshi
By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher…and that is a good thing for any man.
Socrates
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
Lana Turner
Marriage is a great institution, but I’m not ready for an institution.
Mae West |
Stand-up Comedy: What Men Really Think of Their Marriage
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This Unforgettable & Hilarious Performance is One-of-a-Kind!
You don't see such effortless grace in comedy as with these two love birds anymore.
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How the Heck Did They End Up Writing THAT?
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Hilarious: They'll Never Notice if I Take Just One Piece...
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Hilarious These Silly Signs Made Me Laugh!
19 funny signs that were written on purpose to be hilarious and witty.
Hilarious: The Evil Grocery Store!
This is just the kind of pranks I like, and a very creative use of a grocery store!
Hilarious: These Animals Decided to be Jerks Today
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With These Witty Lines Anyome Can be Star of the Party
some funny sayings with a something for everyone.
We All Make These Mistakes as Parents... Hilarious!
When situations like this happen, we cannot help but giggle. Take a look at these hilarious parenting fails.
Hilarious Sketch: The Great Piano Concerto
This hilarious sketch by a classic comedy duo puts you in the middle of the worst execution of a concert imaginable.
Hilariously Funny DIY Fixes (16 Pics)
These hilarious pictures show some of the most unique DIY botch-jobs.
I Can't Stop Laughing at These Hilarious Wedding Photos
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19 Photos Proving That Sleeping Pets Is the Funniest Thing
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Hilarious: 16 of the FUNNIEST DIY Repair Jobs!
These ridiculously funny DIY fixes will crack you up!
These Libraries Will Surprise You With Their Creativity
These libraries have spiced things up with creative twists from the funny librarians who run them.
This Bird Compilation Will Have You Hooting with Laughter
When it comes to entertaining us humans, birds, as you're about to see, are just as good at is as cats and dogs are.
For a Giant Smile, Check Out These Hilarious Cartoons!
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Puns Make Me Smile, and These Made Me Laugh!
Some of these puns are pretty cheesy, but they'll make you feel grate!
Ready to Laugh? The Best Senior Jokes in History!
No wonder they call the golden age the happiest time of your life....
Classic Comedy: Getting Rid of Whom?? (Adult Humor)
I can't stop laughing at this hilarious scene...
These Signs Are Way Too Funny!
You know what time it is? It’s time for some hilariously funny sign!
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Time for another hilarious collection of single-panel comics.
The Lighter Side of Love: 18 Funny Valentine’s Day Quotes
Love is a serious matter, but it’s good to have some humor about it sometimes.
Hilarious: When a Ventriloquist Gets Hypnotized...
Watch this ventriloquist as she does a creative and funny routine I've never seen another ventriloquist do anything like this before!
Beware of These Signs! They Trigger Uncontrollable Laughs
This fresh batch of hilarious signs is not to be missed!
Funny: Young People Don't Have Damn a Clue About Aging!
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Hilarious: Are These Weirdest Signs Ever Made?
Enjoy this hilarious compilation of weird signs that will have you in stitches!
These Hilarious Kids Were Left Unsupervised...
When toddlers or young children are left on their own, the likelihood is a disaster will ensue. Here are 20 timely reminders why they shouldn't be left alone!
I've Been to the Zoo, But I've Never Seen THIS
I would have given a lot to be at that zoo at that particular time. What a laugh!
These Punny Illustrations Will Give You a Good Chuckle
Enjoy this collection of illustrated puns by artist Teo Zirinis.
The Most Hilarious Way of Learning to Play an Instrument!
Part comedy, part musical lesson, you'll laugh yourself silly with this video.
Hilarious: Rowan Atkinson Welcomes You to Hell
Watch this hilarious British comedian's take on the devil introducing new sinners to hell.
These Have to Be the Most Oddly Specific Signs Ever Made
Laugh out loud at these hilariously specific signs that will leave you wondering who exactly they were made for.